Phone calls

So I had a mate call me up, after I promised her I would be doing the actual calling up. She pipped me to the post as it were. She was telling me about her day and every wanky thing in between.

"My I do seem to own a kick ass phone"

FRIEND: So, then I said this to him, he then said this thinkfkjdgfdjgvkjd, blah blah blah

ME: Yeah, uh huh........ok.........exactly. Wow, uh huh, yeah totally..

FRIEND: Then omg she said that thing with the other thing BLAH BLAH BLAH

ME: Is that so? cool.....yeah....ETC

This is a normal conversation, with me providing my ears for someone's drivel. So why does it sting when she gets a call from someone else and promptly hangs up on me?

With big hair comes big responsibilities

So I was thinking about superheroes, I often think about superheroes when I'm not thinking about unicorns and rainbows made from fizzy sugar. I love that shit. Superheroines tend to have aaaaamazing hair,  is it one of their superpowers or something?

'cause I'm worth it

If I were to be a hero what would be my aim be? I'm thinking of making the art of being a useless bum a heroic trait. Come on think about it, in a world full of people rushing around, doing a 9-5 being a bum is like taking a stand against the corporate machine man! 

Now where did I leave those spandex pants?.....

To snob or not to snob, that is the question.

Right, so I'm just watching Teen Mom ( I hate american spelling, goddarn it) and all I can think is have these kids never heard of condoms or contraception? Seriously. 

Unprotected sex + no contraception = Babies, or Aids etc or Aidey babies...or baby Aids?!?!?!

Anyway, just thinking am I a complete snob because I rather watch a documentary on space and all that shenanigans than some twat who probably thought that an empty Snickers wrapper could double up as a condom?

Taste is subjective right? One man's Beck is another man's Ricky Martin. So how comes we still judge people on personal tastes? Yet I find myself silently judging people on their their book collection or lack of, their musical tastes and film habits. I just mentally shake my head when I see my sister watch mind numbingly, degrading spunk bubble that is all reality TV (Apprentice excluded, Overlord Sugaaaaaaaah, no one rocks like he rocks with his arseholey demeaner). Maury Povich; the American Jeremy Kyle basically notifies baby mamas ( another americanism, heck) who the baby daddies are...There have been episodes where he had to do paternity tests for 17 guys all for ONE child.

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, THINK ABOUT THE AIDEY BABIES!

Broken hearts and miserable starts.

So I dreamt last night...yes, yes I know, other peoples' dreams are mind numbingly boring but I'll just give you the gist of it. So here goes, the first one was of finding my younger sister in my room which in it self  is not unusual, but relaxing on my bed was my friend. I found it strange she was there without me and just socialising my sister. I entered my room only to find that it had changed into another room. So far, so normal(ish). I saw all my mates there socialising amongst themselves and I felt like I was being left out of the loop. Then I saw in the corner of the room a friend sitting on a stool NAKED  as is she was the subject of an art class. Fucking weird as in real life she is a observant Muslim! The dream ends.

Right dream two, again some sort of school reunion and everyone's having a good time including me. Then a close friend of mine turns up but I can tell she's only there to show her face as if to say 'hey guy, look, I'm here! Making the effort!'. Now I haven't seen here in real life for a long time and we have sporadically short phone conversations which are more just quick catch ups. In the dream she makes me feel sad and upset. I've had a couple of dreams about her, they seem to be negative and they make my heart ache. It's like I'm being left behind. She should go as far as she can, I just feel like dead weight now.

 So in the dream, the conversation is flowing but I can see that this close friend of mine is on the phone to her new friends she's made at her new work place. She isn't paying attention to anyone and I start to get pissed off. She ends up talking to the bartender and asks the price of some wine, she's planning to go to see her friend afterwards and the wine is for them. By this time I'm really upset and I run off. I find a room and I just fall on the floor and I sob, Bollywood style. The feeling of unhappiness is so real at this point. I can see that she's come to look for me but I hide so she can't find me. The dream ends. I wake up with teary eyes and I start the day with a broken heart.