As I sit here drinking the last slightly gritty part of the tea, I am beginning to understand the love family can have for one another. This idea hasn't slapped me around the face as a 'duh!' moment but more of a slow burning realisation that there is nothing like family. Hell it doesn't have to be blood ties but the deep love shared between people.
Like all superheroes I have strengths and weaknesses. My family are both. They give me hope that I make a difference in this little planet with what I do and what I say. With a flip of a coin they can make me feel so insignificant and powerless. Who else can make me feel loved and yet stifled, than family?
But who would do without them? Not me.
Thursday, 28 July 2011
Friday, 22 July 2011
One small step for (wo)man...
It's time for a new adventure, To experience something that seems scary but life enhancing. What do I need to prepare me on this adventure? I need a To do list.
- To collect my thoughts into a small container; my brain.
- Bring a map wherever the journey.
- Pack light; no space for emotional baggage.
- Glasses to clearly see the light and accept the dark.
- When reaching destination, breathe.
Wish me luck
Tuesday, 19 July 2011
Little bricks make big buildings.
Went to a mate's house today and we were chatting about the usual things; things that pissed us off, things we could do again and family etc, etc. Inevitably our talk ends up with what are we doing with our lives and what fate is going to hand us down the line.
It got me thinking about last year and the personal horrors (of my own making) I went through. Never again do I want to hold myself a hostage in my own depression. Some it boiled down to the fact that I felt like a loser and that feeling doesn't go away easily, forever remaining in the dark, waiting to take me at gunpoint again. To annihilate that feeling, I thought in the beginning of this year I would do things that felt like an achievement no matter how big or small. It was going well when it hit me that some of my friends were doing much better than me and I once again felt like the loser.
What makes that feeling go away, how do you free yourself from the shackles of your own depression and ultimately fear? The only advice I have to give to anyone in my position and to myself is this-DO NOT COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS! My experiences are my experiences and can never fit anyone else. To do things that you wouldn't have done before is a big step in itself. As I said before, from now on I'm going to be my own superhero.
It got me thinking about last year and the personal horrors (of my own making) I went through. Never again do I want to hold myself a hostage in my own depression. Some it boiled down to the fact that I felt like a loser and that feeling doesn't go away easily, forever remaining in the dark, waiting to take me at gunpoint again. To annihilate that feeling, I thought in the beginning of this year I would do things that felt like an achievement no matter how big or small. It was going well when it hit me that some of my friends were doing much better than me and I once again felt like the loser.
What makes that feeling go away, how do you free yourself from the shackles of your own depression and ultimately fear? The only advice I have to give to anyone in my position and to myself is this-DO NOT COMPARE YOURSELF TO OTHERS! My experiences are my experiences and can never fit anyone else. To do things that you wouldn't have done before is a big step in itself. As I said before, from now on I'm going to be my own superhero.
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